I'm Still Having Nightmares About It

Friday, March 25, started out as a totally normal day but it didn't end that way.

Our family dog, Max, was acting completely normal then all of the sudden he started throwing up.  I will spare you most of the sad details, but I will tell you that Max passed away.  It took no longer than 15 minutes from the time he started throwing up until he took his last breath.  He died in my arms.  I was a bawling, hyperventilating wreck.  I couldn't form complete sentences when I called Doug, but he and Barbie rushed over and then were kind enough to take Max's body away.

Doug works at a veterinary clinic and a nice doctor there did an autopsy.  Max died when a fist-sized tumor on one of his kidneys, ruptured.  We didn't even know he had a tumor; he showed no signs! 
Aslynn was taking a nap when Max died. When she got up from her nap, I was still crying and I told her that Max went to live with Heavenly Father.  

We miss Max.  For about a week and a half after he died, Aslynn would ask where he was.  I would answer her question by asking her the same one, "Where is Max, Z?"  She would tell me, "With Heavenly Father."  Now she just asks when Max is coming back.

I loved having a pet.  I need to have a pet again.  I feel that a lovable, loyal pet is an amazing de-stressor.  Also, I like having someone to talk to, who doesn't talk back.

I am now on the hunt for a new furry family member.  I have my heart on a large dog that is low-shedding.  I am hoping for a Goldendoodle or a Labradoodle.  The problem is, they are very expensive.  I know there are lots of dogs out there in need of a home, so I am looking at rescues and at the animal shelters instead of a breeder. 

I originally asked Luke if I could get a Great Dane but he said "No" because he doesn't want me to have to deal with another dog dying in my arms in the near future. (Great Danes have short lifespans.)  If you hear of any Doodle puppies available in southern California, let me know! 

Rest in peace, Max.  We love you!